Non-touchy people (such as myself) need to adjust accordingly to the traditions and rituals of the culture in which they hope to live, work, and build friendships.
Because of this I have been forced to become more comfortable with the Haitian way of kissing a cheek upon greeting. I'd never go so far as to say that it feels natural to me, but I roll with it as best I can.
Every so often I might run into a person that does two cheeks or even three ... Not going to lie, all that back and forth really throws me for a loop. I've never quite understood the rules of engagement because sometimes people full on kiss your cheek and other times they simply touch cheek to cheek. It is sort of like a cheek high-five. I don't know when you are supposed to do one and when you are supposed to do the other. It's quite vexing, I know that much.
The three kisses crowd?
That just seems excessive. Gives me vertigo.
I've been doing some charting and graphing and I can confirm that greetings and goodbyes take one billion times longer ... But to heck with that observation, what is time anyway?
Saturday Paige's boyfriend was over visiting her. He comes from the kiss-the-cheek-crowd so I always attempt to get with the program and follow the rules.
He was sitting down on the floor with Paige when I leaned down to greet him. I didn't know he was going to move and I completely misjudged and overshot the distance between us as I approached for my culturally appropriate greeting.
In one terribly awkward slow-motion moment I missed his cheek, instead kissing below his cheek in the region commonly referred to as, the neck.
Earth swallow me whole.
Embarrassed, I quickly exited the room. For the next several hours I hoped he didn't think I meant to kiss his neck. Creeper mom much?
A few days have passed now, and I think I am finally ready to talk about it.
According to Wikipedia: