30 months ago as we prepared to move to Haiti, we were not ready to sell our house in MN. Maybe we were a pathetic combination of short-sighted and totally chicken- or -maybe we were incredibly wise. The jury is still out. Whichever it was, today we sold it.
It is an exciting and sad feeling. The comfort of "having a physical place to call home" is gone, but the stress of the renter and the payment are also gone. Last night I laid in bed having conversations with myself about it all. It went like this for hours until I finally cried to get it over with and then forced myself to think about something else so I might have a shot at some sleep. I believe this stream of consciousness is what would be called unresolved.
A short sampling of the insanity:
- Oh I am not sure we should have sold, I love the memories in that house
- but the propane expense would have killed us if we ever went back - seriously who can afford to heat a house anymore - I would have had to pick up shifts all the time
- But the two trees we planted in the front yard and their significance it is SAD that we left them there
- But the bathroom floor was so icky and needed replacing
- I love the fireplace - I will miss it and the snuggling by it
- The kitchen was too small
- Who cares I hate to cook
- No more massive mortgage debt
- No more house
- Free from huge loan - how liberating
- Everyone has huge loans - it is the American way
- I painted every single wall in that house myself
- The stuff I chose for the bathroom is too country and dated - not even my taste
- The neighbors make the entire street look like crud
- But our place was kind of cute in spite of the appliances in their yards
- I will miss the lake so much - and the view
- That lake was more of a swamp
- Ha! Remember when that boat we had just bought filled with water and sank!?
- Oh, Paige learned to water ski on that lake-swamp!
- It would be nice to have it to go back to if we needed/wanted
- We can go anywhere, we don't have to go to THAT house
- I love our old bedroom
- but it was really cold on January mornings
- If I have no home in MN am I still a Minnesotan? Huh.
- Maybe we should have waited until the market recovered and made a decent profit
- God will provide - He operates above profits and markets (repeat repeat repeat)
- Hope and Isaac and Noah all came home to that house as their first home - oh! sad!
- Phoebe and Lydie didn't - Britt and Paige didn't - that is more that did not than did - get over it you sappy fool
- It sure was nice to have a renter covering the payment and still have the tax benefits
- Tax benefits? Those are just words- you don't even know what you're saying. Who are you??? Seriously.
- Is Haiti home now?
- Haiti is not home.
- Haiti IS home.
- Minnesota is home.
- No it is not. You have no home.
- I want to live there again - I love it!
- I am glad I never have to live there again - there are way better places! God has us in Haiti for a long while anyway.
The real estate deal was one of the oddest in history. Our house had been on the market since November 15. We like to wait until the 1. worst time in the history of the real estate market AND 2. the worst time of the calendar year combined --- then make our move to sell. We are retarded like that.
Of course not one person looked at it until the holiday season was over. One of the coldest winters on record helped nothing when we ran out of high-priced-propane and had to make the decision to let the house get/stay cold.
One person who looked at it left feedback that said, "It was too cold to see." As in, their retinas froze in place or something along those lines.
Once the house was heated again we had an offer come in. We have a crusty old realtor (that is for all of you at New Joy Church) that told us the offer was an insult and not to take it, and we agreed with him. The buyers were asking for ridiculous amounts of furniture for free, plus the offer was total crud.
We went back with a strong counter offer which they accepted. The closing was set for May 16. A few days later they switched it to May 8. A few days later we found out our septic tank drain field is "non compliant." That is a huge problem. We figured the deal would be off or slowed way down. Wrong. They wanted to close on April 28 or 29 instead. Huh????
The septic drain field is still crappy (pun intended) but it will be fixed with escrow money. (The DNR takes issue with non-compliant septic systems draining into lakes. Go figure.)
I think it is good that my Dad went and acted as Power of Attorney at closing because I would have wanted to ask them what they were thinking with their first offer and why the spazzy rush to close. I dislike them. Mostly for totally irrational reasons. I don't even know them; but still - the dislike.
We were asked to price out our furniture for them so they could decide what to buy. We priced it all at low garage sale prices. None of it was intended for haggling. For example, two fairly new dehumidifiers were priced at $10 each. They counter offered on ten dollar items. They offered $5 each. Seriously. You're buying a house for many thousands of dollars and you want to act like you're in Tijuana dickering over blankets or a Sombrero. Please.
And so, it is done. There is no house to go back to - so I guess we better not ever want to run away. Do I find it odd that this house has such a hold on me? Yes. Do I question if maybe I am too wrapped up in the dumb place? Yes. Does it make sense to be so weird and possessive about a house that I have not even lived in since December of 2005 when I am surrounded by people that live in 10X10 huts? No. It makes no sense and it is not too cool either.
(Troy is not the least bit torn - I just called to tell him it all went through and he said, "Hallelujah the monkey is off my back." )
Men. :( hrumph.
I question the wisdom in letting you inside my tortured mind ... but it's written now - and nobody ever accused me of being wise. Plus, the only other thing I have to blog about today is mosquitoes, sick kids, and slow Internet ... and all of that is equally uninteresting blogging material.
TO Dave Foy -
(someone read this to him or help him get on the Internet or something)
Thank you for everything you and your team did for us. We know you never signed up for the real-estate drama this turned into, but you stuck with us and we appreciate you and have been blessed by the love you've shown us.
(And - if you're buying/selling a house in the Twin Cities, Dave is your guy - call him!)
troy and tara and family