After sending kids out the door this morning, I sat down for a cathartic little cry to accompany my coffee. It felt great. We are juggling such joyous and happy things while also carrying the weight of unjust and difficult things. We find ourselves trapped in a glass cage of emotion. Much (most) about life in Haiti is finding a way to live joyfully in the midst of that constant tension. There is no escaping the fact that tragedy tries to trample on triumph. There is no denying that joy and sorrow are always dancing and intertwined in complex ways. I suppose this 'glass cage' is mainly a weird manifestation of grief. The post (below) on grief rang true to me because a part of the sajoy (sad joy - that's a thing) we are feeling lately is due to getting ready for Paige's graduation celebration and the joining of many friends in two weeks.
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Excerpts below, find the full post HERE.(From Communicating Across Boundaries)
Research shows that those of us who have grown up as third culture kids have layers on layers of loss.
Dave Pollock, a man who arguably did more to understand the third culture kid experience than any other before his death, said this: “One of the major areas in working with TCKs is that of…dealing with the issue of unresolved grief. They are always leaving or being left. Relationships are short-lived.At the end of each school year, a certain number of the student body leaves, not just for the summer, but for good.It has to be up to the parent to provide a framework of support and careful understanding as the child learns to deal with this repetitive grief.”
He ends the paragraph with these words:
“Most TCKs go through more grief experiences by the time they are 20 than monocultural individuals do in a lifetime.”
Grief is good.Grief is individual.Grief is rarely nicely organized.Grief is physical and emotional.Grief is culturally based.Laughter in the midst of grief is okay.