Thursday, March 01, 2007

Where's the sass?

I got an email, indicating that the lack of sarcasm is bringing people down. ;-) It is odd to go three, even four days without being sarcastic or mean to someone. I guess the nice Tara is here for now. I'll try to go back to being a jerk real soon.

I think I am just in one of those "what is the meaning of this" sort of places and it leaves me more pensive and less zippy.

This is what I have come up with:

I don't know the greater meaning of anything. I cannot understand why some things are such an uphill battle and others are so simple. God is God. And I don't get His ways sometimes. Okay. Most of the time. And that must be why I am just Tara and He is God.

I like to spend seven, eight days thinking and praying and coming up with real earth-shattering stuff like that.

Okay... So... Here is the deal here. Mr. Arnold Lemke came in today, he is the mission founder. This makes boss number two on the property. Once your boss comes to stay right where you live for a few weeks you can tell me not to be stressed, until then ... trust me, it's an interesting place to find yourself.

Dad and I took the two boys to go get him. Arnold approves of my driving skills in Haiti. A friend recently noted that I am better suited for this video-game-type of driving scenario anyway. There are no rules- and rules seemed to be what got me in trouble driving in Minnesota. Just ask Britt about the time I pulled out into a guy's truck in front of her entire swim-team. In Haiti, it is okay to pull out anytime you want. My driving problems have all been solved.

We stopped at Delimart on the way to the airport. I was hoping to pick up some extra deli meat. I walked up and asked for one lb. of turkey to start. The three people behind the counter stood arms crossed and shook their heads 'no.' They then said "Gen pwoblem avek scale." They were refusing a paying customer any meat because the scale could not weight it. I don't work in a deli but I bet you I could come within 6 ounces of a pound just by using the power of an educated guess. I also bet you that it never occurred to them to just wing it and round-up and still make some sales at the deli counter. That is far too logical. I especially enjoyed that three employees were standing there to tell me that they wouldn't be able to help me. Why pay one person to stand there when you can pay three?

(NOW you've got plenty of sarcasm to go on.)

The convention begins tomorrow. Friday morning there is a Pastor's training session and then Friday night is a full service with music and preaching.

Troy has been running running running. He was delusional and thought that he could get this culture to plan ahead. Not so. Why do today what you can put off until it makes everything really hard? The last minute requests are rolling in. His favorite response for the day, "Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine." I think it is mainly lost on the people though. It simply serves to help him remain cool.

The cow is set to die at 4am on Saturday. 30 hours left to live. Troy says he is waking up to see it. I am not. I can live the rest of my life without knowing how you go about killing a cow. Thank you very much.

Tonight Troy put a full slide show of most of his LaDigue photos up on the big screen, with music behind it and everything. The employees and friends who were around LOVED it. It was so cool to see how excited they were.

On the family front - all kids are doing well.

Britt- did a chemistry lab with red cabbage today. (See photo.) Paige-did her school work, helped with Phoebe and Hope and did the social butterfly thing. Arnold saw her standing in the drive and said "who is that?" That is how much she has changed this year. She went from a little girl to a young lady since he last saw her in May.

Ike-ran around all morning, then slept the whole way to Port au Prince this afternoon. Noah-acted insane at the National Station and drew a lot of attention. Hope-bossed the boys around and made sure that everything they did had been previously approved by me. Top six words in Hope's vocabulary "Does Mom know you're doing that?"

Phoebe- might be experiencing tiny improvements with her fungus-head. She sleeps like a champ and eats like a champ and is generally a very easy baby. Once her head stops itching and making her nutty, I would be willing to put her in the "best baby alive" contest. That is the only thing holding her back from winning.

Peanut got into a thorn bush, no exaggerating - she had 100 thorns all over her. The kind with a fish hook in them. In the roof of her mouth, on her nose, legs, back ... it wasn't pretty. It took Dad, Britt and I working together to pin her down and pull them out. Pinning down a 110 lb animal is a workout.

I'll give your regards to the cow tomorrow. I'll also make sure he knows that the machete to the throat is not a personal thing. It's just business.