Sunday, May 13, 2012

oh mother


Aaaaahhhh. Motherhood ...

...That beautiful 18 year multiple decade blink of an eye wherein our children continually honor us as they daily 'rise up and call us blessed'. 

Ahem.

When we arrived to our "family fun day" (above) Lydia rose up to call me something  ... But it wasn't blessed. 

Happy Mother's Day to all ... but especially to the mothers with children that are not paying any attention to Proverbs. 


(Late in the same day, a miraculous transformation ....)

Britt(22)Paige(17)Isaac(10) Hope(10)Noah(8)Phoebe(5)Lydia(4)

In all seriousness, today is a day to give thanks for all that I'm being trusted with.  (It doesn't.make. sense.at.all. - not on paper, not in reality to be entrusted with ^that^)!  I don't know how to be fair, how to make enough time for everyone, how to meet individual needs, how to affirm them each, how to foster everyone's special talents and abilities, how to fill the holes of jealousy, hurts, and human failures .... I don't even know where to begin to do any of that.

Sometimes I go to bed at night knowing I didn't do the best job; that I failed in some way. In 22 years of trying to be good at this  I've learned that the best gift I can give these children is to honestly admit that without God's help I can't do anything. My love will never ever be perfect, my patience will fail. I won't meet their every need. His love is perfect. His patience never fails. His perfect love and grace are sufficient if they can learn to trust it ...  If I can learn to trust it. 

Praying for a day of His sufficient peace, love, mercy and grace for moms with children, moms who have lost their children, and for those that have been praying and waiting and hoping to have a child.