Tuesday, May 30, 2006


Photo Credits- Scott Tanner, May 2006

I feel like our blog goes in waves. Some weeks you get trivial story, after trivial story of Eddy and Toro and Guinness and total nonsense. Some weeks I am sharing every little thought God puts in my brain. Notice, the word little ... my thoughts are so little; little and repetitive. I KNOW I am repeating myself. I wish I could alternate funny post, serious post, trivial post. It just doesn't work that way.

Lately, I am in a much more serious place. You probably picked up on that. I think this "place" I am in is mainly due to a lot of trying really, really hard to understand why God does things a certain way. The things He does that I don't like or get.

It is stupid. (I am stupid?) I am spinning my wheels and I need to quit trying to understand it all, and just trust Him. (Repeat theme, yes I know it is.)

We love it here. It is a difficult place to live but we love it.

We do think that Haiti will bring out the worst in you if you are not constantly checking yourself. We have found that if you have any sort of patience or anger issue, this place will test you and magnify those issues.

Too bad Troy is so angry and impatient. KIDDING!

Seriously, we are learning to control our tongues; to control our lack of patience and we are coming to understand what Jesus asked when He told us to love our neighbors. We don't think he meant love them if you feel like it or love them when it is easy. He meant love them when they don't tell you the truth and love them when they don't return your kindness.

Dishonesty is real all over the world. We know the USA is not some shining example of honest, perfect people. Haiti and its poverty seem to breed dishonesty and pride. If you do not constantly ask for the Lord's guidance it would be easy to get angry at the people you are here to serve. Getting angry and being less than loving would sort of make you ineffective as an example of Christ and His love for ALL people.

This blog entry has gone astray ... as usual I have NO idea what my point is. I mainly want to convey that we are learning as we serve. God is faithful, even when I don't get what He is doing --He is faithful.

Below is the coolest song by Jill Phillips. Troy and I really dig it. There is truth in these lyrics for us. If you can get ahold of the song we bet you will like it.

We really love you guys and thank you for helping us be here learning as we serve.

Live By The Sword - Jill Phillips

I don't see why I don't see what bothers me
And I don't know why I don't know what won't let me go
I should have listened to myself when I had it down
This dose of my own medicine is too big to swallow now
This is the time when I find what's inside of me
This is the time when I decide what I believe

If I want to be real in this world
Then I have to realize
If I am going to live by the sword
I'm gonna have to die by the sword

It's easy to be calm when there's no crashing tide
It's easy to be quiet when it's loud outside
It's easy to be humble when you're glorified
But now I'm out here on my own and screaming from inside
This is the time when I find what's inside of me
This is the time when I decide what I believe


You stripped me down to basics
You left my heart exposed
There is no pride in times like this
No one said it was easy
No one said it was fair
But nobody's happy when it is

Lord, I need your loving arms to carry me
When I look in the mirror and don't like what I see
I know you know what I desire to do -- So help me follow even when it's not easy to